WE ARE ALL BORN TO BE LOVED
As babies we were all born connected. Have you ever tickled a babies toes and watched how the sensations of pleasure and delight ripple throughout the nervous system. Our bodies are naturally wired from head to toe to experience full bodied blissful pleasure. Our natural energy flows effortlessly and spontaneously throughout our whole body. Unfortunately, as we grow up we start the process of shutting down our connections and by adulthood we have greatly restricted our capacity for pleasure.
In my work I have deeply experienced and feel that allowing more intimacy and pleasure in our lives is the doorway to real transformation.
As human beings we each have a natural ability to give and receive pleasure and to gift that to each other. As infants we were all born open, vulnerable and loving, our bodies were naturally wired from head to toe to experience full-bodied pleasure.Then as we become adults we slowly lose our full sensory connections and develop our habitual patterns of closure and contraction in our bodies and our minds.
It’s as if by the time we are 4yrs old through our parental and cultural beliefs and conditioning we all start to develop an impenetrable wall that surrounds us. This wall has us enveloped in layers of invisible wounds. These wounds consist of all the times we have ever felt fearful and unloved. So whenever someone touches one of these wounds unexpectedly, as so often happens in our intimate relating we instinctively contract and recoil like the sea anemone back into our shells. Or we react and angrily hit back at the others wounds, as we aggressively defend ourselves from further injury.
This process continues over time and each relationship we enter into adds to the injury of these sensitive delicate areas that never really have a chance to heal, we then build even thicker walls to enclose ourselves in. Slowly our entire psyche becomes covered by these wounds that are very painful to be touched. To make matters worse we look around and see everybody is the same they are all suffering just as much as we are and are all under the same cultural trance and we begin to think that this condition of suffering and pain on planet Earth is actually normal.
It’s as if by the time we are 4yrs old through our parental and cultural beliefs and conditioning we all start to develop an impenetrable wall that surrounds us. This wall has us enveloped in layers of invisible wounds. These wounds consist of all the times we have ever felt fearful and unloved. So whenever someone touches one of these wounds unexpectedly, as so often happens in our intimate relating we instinctively contract and recoil like the sea anemone back into our shells. Or we react and angrily hit back at the others wounds, as we aggressively defend ourselves from further injury.
This process continues over time and each relationship we enter into adds to the injury of these sensitive delicate areas that never really have a chance to heal, we then build even thicker walls to enclose ourselves in. Slowly our entire psyche becomes covered by these wounds that are very painful to be touched. To make matters worse we look around and see everybody is the same they are all suffering just as much as we are and are all under the same cultural trance and we begin to think that this condition of suffering and pain on planet Earth is actually normal.
So when it comes to our love lives is it any wonder things do not always work out as planned.
As in order to relate to one another we need to be continually protecting our delicate wounds, and the very things that we need to experience which is the closeness and intimacy we actually pull back from and don’t allow because it hurts. But still, the instinct to love is so strong that we willingly put ourselves back out there again and continually pay a very high price to be in relationship.
As in order to relate to one another we need to be continually protecting our delicate wounds, and the very things that we need to experience which is the closeness and intimacy we actually pull back from and don’t allow because it hurts. But still, the instinct to love is so strong that we willingly put ourselves back out there again and continually pay a very high price to be in relationship.
Thankfully, the good news is that there is another way and that we can relearn to be open , vulnerable and loving again and we can equip ourselves with the tools to help heal our wounds and to take the steps to mastery in love and relationships.
